Bad Brownie

Hey babes! I’m back! And I’m bad! How Bad? Bad Brownie bad! Do you love an exclamation mark too?!!!!!!!

Do you know who else is bad? Oh yeah.

I still cannot get over it. Princess Diana’s death will never leave me – she understood me. She knew what I was going through. Oh and Michael Jackson’s too. Were you also part of the Michael Jackson fan club? He used to write to me on a monthly basis – he never directly answered my questions from my letters, but I know he read them and tried to answer.

I think Daddy went to his parties too, but he won’t talk about it, just tells me to shut up. Too bad.

Anyway, Bad Brownie. This better be a thriller.

Bad Jokes

As you might guess, Bad Brownie sell brownies. You know, from the name of the company? You can have them delivered to your door either as a one-off or on a subscription basis.

I first discovered them in March when it became clear that princesses should no longer mix with common people in the street – I wanted to know where I was going to get my chocolate fix from without the danger of my servant being contaminated at Waitrose.

Yet I didn’t get around to ordering until last week – I was being chauffeured to go see Mother so I thought I’d take a treat for her – not that she would appreciate it, she still eats Kit Kats. Kit Kats! Can you believe that?

Bad Brownie have several boxes available at any time, including vegan and no-gluten boxes (I prefer gluten and no-vegan myself), bestsellers, latest flavours and crunchy ones – you can look yourself, babe.

I went for the Bestseller 12 box at £14.50 plus delivery – though in retrospect I should have had 24, had I known that I’d only end up having two flavours. Flavours in this box were – Salted Caramel, Triple Chocolate, Peanut Butter and Ferrero Rocher.

Bad Brownie box

Delivery was smoother than a…Smooth Criminal…sigh…you’ll have to excuse my dodgy sense of humour. Ordered Sunday night and received by Tuesday lunchtime, via my fave delivery company, DPD. It’s normal to have a fave delivery company, right? It certainly isn’t fucking Herpes or Yodel, that’s for sure.

Bad Brownie

So how were the two I sampled?

The triple chocolate was pretty luxurious – the right amount of chocolate intensity without going too “waaaa”.

The other one I had was the ferrero rocher – the hazelnut topping gave that extra slight crunchy satisfaction, though it remained fairly intensely chocolatey.

Bad Brownie brownies

I’m advised that the salted caramel brownie was superb, and the peanut butter one also had compliments – from Mother too.

These are quite small brownie bites, but 10 times better than those at Waitrose (granted 10 times the price) – and I shudder to think just how much better they are than those at Tesco, or wincing, Asda.

Bad Summary

Value for money: 4/10
Ease of cooking: n/a (maybe I have to rethink my scoring criteria?)
Delivery: 10/10
Quality Of Ingredients: 8/10
Originality: 7/10

This gives a healthy score of 72.5%. A DeliverWoo for sure – though a bit DeliverWaa on the value for money option.

Paying £19.49 for 12 small brownie bites (and only eating 4 or 5 of them) doesn’t strike me as the best value for money. Granted I don’t really understand the concept of value – Daddy pays – but you might, so I just have to imagine it like I would a lesbian kiss.

I do understand that not everyone has as much money as Daddy or my buddy, Tristram, who I’m delighted to see will be getting funding from the government for his job as Arts Director. Maybe they should be funding us bloggers too? And what about nurses? Why don’t we pay them £200,000 a year too? Fucking selfish Tories.

Anyway, as gorgeous as these brownies are, I just don’t envisage paying £19.49 again when I can send my servant to Waitrose to get my chocolate fix for no more than his hourly wage.

At least, I didn’t envisage it until I saw the new flavours – Red Velvet Cookie Dough and Strawberry Prosecco – INSERT HEART EMOJI.

Maybe just one more box…

I even heard a rumour that they are going to do a collaboration with Doughnut Time – my fave doughnut place. Watch this space. Well, maybe watch their space.

I’m so getting another box aren’t I? Maybe you should too

Right, I’m off to heal the world, whilst my blog makes it a better place. Please share – you know I’m new to this whole blogging thing and it means a lot. Mwah.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *